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An adoptive parent of a brown boy who she describes as having “a perpetual tan” states that her worry for him growing up is that “statistically” brown and black men are more likely to commit violent acts and thus end up in prison: Not the school-to-prison pipeline, not systemic racism, but that the pre-condemned child […]
I recently received an email from an old mailing list that I guess I’m still on because I presented at their conference a while back. It was promoting an online discussion of a train wreck of a book written by E. Kay Trimberger, entitled Creole Son [sic]. Everything about the event outlined in the email […]
We are, I believe, currently witnessing the adoption equivalent of the resurgent and unapologetic racism and classism found elsewhere in society as white supremacy and fascism “unstructure” themselves and present fully within dominant discourses. By this I mean to say that there are adopters who present themselves as “perfected caregivers”, despite issues of race or class. There are adopters who no longer hide their loathing of the children temporarily in their care. They no longer feign guarding their privacy, or pretend that they are acting beneficently or charitably. They no longer are attempting to uphold their expected performance.
As in multiple, and not a command to do math… For some reason I woke up this morning remembering a post-it note of key points I’d scribbled down after a shower about a year ago when I didn’t have time to craft a decent post. Nothing has changed, except the post-it note, sadly, got tossed. […]
Last week my daughter emailed me asking for the best resources to point someone beginning their identity journey to. I realized I couldn’t give her a straight answer, despite being deeply embedded in adoption land for many years. My own journey didn’t start until I was in my mid 40’s. After my parents died. It […]
Adoption is complex. All of it. And sometimes we, as adoptees, don’t fully understand how complex it is until we lose our adoptive parents. Because many times, our adoptive parents, good or bad, are the only people who moored us to existence.
ASAC presents Voices of Adoption, an evening of literary readings, featuring Jennifer Kwon Dobbs, Susan Harness, Julayne Lee, and Lee Herrick (and many other talented writers). Free and open to the public! The literary event will take place on Friday, October 19, at the Oakland Asian Cultural Center (388 9th St., Oakland), starting at 8:00 […]
JS Lee (@jessicasunlee) on Twitter asks: Adoptees: How many names have you legally had? I’ve had at least four. Unsure if I had another name before I reached the orphanage.
NOTE: This was originally a post at my blog; over the years I’ve gotten progressively more heartsick at the unending constant of adoptees in their nation-states of adoption trying to make sense of their trauma via the tools of the dominant culture in their country—the cultures that adopted us. We’ve been advocating our case for […]
I went for a checkup for the first time in a very long time, now that I have this thing called “health insurance” because I’m living and working in Canada. Honestly I was extremely worried; I hadn’t had a proper checkup in ages. There came the moment we all know and dread when my doctor […]
Over on Twitter, Lilly Schmaltz 飞岗 (@lillyschmaltz) just tweeted out: Small accomplishment. Just had my first Mandarin text message conversation with a native speaker—only needed my dictionary a few times! Feelin’ good 😆 And it made me smile, myself having learned the language “I would have spoken if….”—I know how difficult a road it is, […]
I live in Canada now, and the recent news has been talking about the country’s senate’s hearings and report on the Baby Scoop targeted destruction of Indigenous communities here via adoption: [link] and [link]. Much talk about “healing”, and “moving forward”, etc. Australia did something similar 10 years ago [link]. I’ll hold off on adding […]
What do you make of current efforts to slam the current “administration” in the US for having separated immigrant children from their parents? The disgust and horror in the media is, to me, rather hypocritical. I say that as someone who grew up looking at missing children’s faces on the back of milk cartons, who […]
So hip to adopt. A new generation of rainbow family. Am I being too cynical, or what? Adoptees, what are your thoughts on this millennial web t.v. fare? https://fusion.kinja.com/the-viola-davis-backed-racism-battling-detective-sitco-1796256983
I’ll keep this short. At this time last year I found out my story and visited my mother’s crypt where I keened for the one I cannot remember. At the same time, my cousin’s father contacted my eldest half-brother, hoping to establish a connection. My half-brother rejected this, we imagine due to worries about someone […]