I have a question for the adoptees here that has to do with something that came up earlier, the idea that we are “perpetual children”. This ties in to ideas I’ve had where the non-responsive child adoptee is the ideal, with the ensuing stages of that child’s life requiring a kind of stifling of any response that doesn’t fit the adoption narrative as we know it today.
To resist adoption then in any way would seem to break this narrative, and point out the emperor’s new clothes, as it were. I know that many adoptees become estranged from their adoptive parents, and I am also aware of legal ruptures of adoption, as well as families adopting back the children they previously gave up. I am wondering whether any of you have experienced anything similar? Do we have words to describe this phenomenon? What does it say about adoption as an institution to begin with? Does this break allow us to finally “grow up” and attain adulthood?