Desire and longing: The Consumerist Construction of Childhood

I want to ask your thinking about the claim that childhood in North America (at least) has been making children into consumers for decades and that essential to that project has been the “constant stimulation of desire and longing.” Do you see practices underlying adoption and donor conception that reflect that kind of stimulation of […]

The Break with the Past

In the days when nostalgia was a disease people were punished for looking back. A nostalgic soldier might have been buried alive for expressing that they miss home. “For a little boy who missed his wet nurse, doctors brought her back and then slowly conditioned him to spend time away from her. The soldiers sometimes […]

Natural and Unnatural Parents

Both adoption and donor conception practices produce children whose parents (or at least one of the parents) are social constructs. Nature is removed from the relationship and replaced with legal forms. For adoptees, the courts assign adults who in all respects are intended to become full and sole parents. They are creations of law. For […]

Deliberately wounding new generations

I was struck reading the comment quoted below. This person, who goes by StraightGrandmother, is fine with donor-conceived offspring never having access to their “donor’s” identity even when that ignorance might injure them. Values like hers are common in adoption practice too. I can still find adopters writing in public forums that they chose international […]

Fantasy and History

Maybe the better word is fabrication and history because history has a natural dose of fantasy.  Every history involves the imagination. History includes specific information that is often at question for adoptees.  Reports from social workers or agencies may be accurate or not, truthful or not. Place of birth, stories about parents may or may […]

Why were we “relinquished”?

I put “relinquished” because not everyone was…some were stolen, others abandoned, some lost?  I ask because there are many reasons, many causes for our path leading to adoption.  My own cause for becoming vulnerable to adoption lay in new circumstances and old roots.  There was something stemming from modern circumstances and things arising from ancient […]

Reincarnation and human nature

I find that being a transracial adopted person, with international roots, has not hurt thinking in a ways beyond local norms.  My adoptive parents were Episcopal Christians and I remain an Episcopal Christian (in fact am an Episcopal priest), but they were a little upset that I was reading what I was and asking about […]