Adoption and “Chaperone Syndrome”.

I saw a post that compared adoption to Stockholm Syndrome, the name given to those kidnapped who eventually identify with their captors [link to article]. It got me thinking about adoptees who no longer identify with their adopters, for reasons having to do with age, evolution, rematriation, etc. But I wanted to expand a little […]

What’s in a name? Re-thinking the terms “adoptee” and “adopted”

I was proactive at a very young age. Ok, full disclosure: I am wordy-nerdy. I have been thinking about how we define ourselves as either adopted or as adoptees. Both of these words feel very much about action that happened TO us. One EFL site referred to adjectives ending in ‘ed’ as words that “show […]

The empty circle: honoring and validating our complex identities

****This is my first post with TRE and I would like to share my gratitude to Daniel and the other contributors for this space. And for you, readers. I have this memory from 3rd grade. On the surface, it’s a fairly mundane image; I am staring at a piece of paper with a large circle […]

The Adopted as Hero

In Jung’s Symbols of Transformation, at one point he remarks on the irregular origins of birth for heroes in many sacred traditions: The hero is not born like an ordinary mortal because his birth is rebirth from the mother-wife. That is why the hero so often has two mothers. As Rank has shown with a […]

Living With The Denial of Culture

The following arrives at the point of asking: In the face of too much irresolvable complexity, must we simply say “fuck it” and accept and live by the (untenable) premise that we can go on living “without culture” by taking whatever we pick up (individually) to have the sustaining and grounding quality that actual culture […]

Since It Takes a Village …

“It takes a village to raise a child” is probably the single-most profound or useful proverb as far as recognizing the needs of children growing up. Capitalism presupposes that villages need not exist, should not exist, must be destroyed. So, there you see the very heart of the critique–around the world where the State interrupted […]

Who’s appropriating now?

I’ve been wrangling with my discomfort at a recent Korean American / Korean Adopteee Diaspora / Korean Queer gathering in honor of a Korean holiday (Thanksgiving) NOT in Korea, and I realized that I never want to attend another gathering of people focused on identity exploration and culture embracing from abroad ever again.  I wrangled […]

A New Low for Adoption? A New Sign of Hope? Or More Backlash?

I feel it almost gratuitous or senseless to post this update on the legal fandango, all done openly and above board, in the public theft of Veronia from the Cherokee Nation, but nonetheless, the discourse of the article still seems so rich and impenetrable (see here): In the context of that “victory,” however, what I […]

The Break with the Past

In the days when nostalgia was a disease people were punished for looking back. A nostalgic soldier might have been buried alive for expressing that they miss home. “For a little boy who missed his wet nurse, doctors brought her back and then slowly conditioned him to spend time away from her. The soldiers sometimes […]

Yellow fever: The exotic adoptee.

I found this sitting in the “pending” pile; Girl4708 has given me permission to update and post. She originally wrote: As I approved another comment today on a blog post I wrote about Woody Allen, I wondered about tan fever, brown fever, and black fever as Asian adoptions decline and other countries become sources for […]

The “middlemen” of return.

In a previous question [link] I asked whether you as an adoptee would repatriate yourself if your place of birth afforded you some kind of re-entry to the country, language, culture, etc. Girl4708 replied at the time: The power differential on a smaller scale doesn’t change: the haves will always overpower the have-nots. As an […]

The “Painted Bird”: Preserved “culture” and adoptive backlash.

The controversy over Jerzy Kosinski’s novel The Painted Bird remains, but for me the central image of the novel still holds: A birdcatcher paints one of his flock in bright colors; seen as foreign by the other birds, it is attacked and killed. This is the image that occurred to me after reading a news […]